May 22, 2025
América, Where The Hell Have You Been Loca?
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América has been on a long hiatus. It’s a long story, but she won’t trauma dump or bore you with it today. She’s here to give a quick update and let her friends know what she’s been up to. Even though she’s still had a few “mental health breakdowns” along the way, her head is still in the game and more focused than ever.
Fair warning: the audio levels in this episode are a little all over the place. She tried to fix it, but it’s a bit chaotic, kind of like her life right now.
Like everything América does, she completely overthought this podcast and this episode. She recorded it twice, tried editing the second take, then realized she liked the first one better. She spent way too much time trying to cut out the ums (she says a lot of ums) and adjust the audio. In the end, she decided to leave it. Everything online is too filtered so lets leave it unfiltered and a little messy, just like the country she is in.
Help shape future episodes!
Leave a voicemail or shoot us a text. I actually wanna hear from you! I like constructive criticism.
Follow along on TikTok and Instagram: @la_ameriquita, @lachismosadelvalle
WEBVTT
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okay i am just testing this and seeing if i can record on my phone in my truck that's right i am a truck girl now it fits the vibe of the new town that i am in Don't worry.
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I have everything I need.
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I have a little mic, water, and something to record.
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I don't have a guest.
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It's just me.
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So I don't really need anything fancy right now.
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Let's just record and let's just do this.
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Okay?
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Hi, everyone.
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It's been a minute.
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Actually, it's been...
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a little over two years since i last posted anything on here but before we get into it i just want to say yes the name has changed this podcast was originally called las chismosas del valle and to my english speaking friends that translates to the gossip girls of the valley but now it's just me so welcome to la chismosa del valle why the name change well i'm still very much that girl that talks a little too much and maybe asks a little too many questions but maybe you know asks either the wrong questions or doesn't ask them directly or um just doesn't ask any questions at the right time I brain freeze, and I think that's why I get a little nervous to come up here.
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But after all, that's what I went to school for, is to learn how to use my little brain of asking whys and then turn them into something, right?
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So it's kind of what I've known for, and whether I like it or not, I figured I might as well just own up to it.
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Truthfully, I'm learning to talk a little less and smile more.
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while keeping that young scrappy and hungry energy alive okay so now back to it I don't have a perfect excuse for a long break life has happened actually a lot has happened mentally emotionally I couldn't get myself behind a mic I started this podcast in college.
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After I graduated, I was so burnt out from media, work, and school.
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I thought I'd rest for the summer and come back in the fall, but life just kept spiraling.
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The political climate got heavier and so did my mental health.
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If you've listened before, you probably know I'm a DACA recipient, and if you follow me on social media, I have shared a lot of my personal struggles with mental health.
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So no matter what people say, no matter how normal some people tried to make it sound, these times are not easy for those of us living without a status or under DACA.
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When I first started journalism, I think I've said this like a bajillion times, the president was attacking both the media and Mexicans.
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And here I was, here I am.
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A Mexican trying to work in media.
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And I'm honestly, I have been trying to do my best without taking things too personally and taking things too heavy.
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What helps me keep going is hearing other Latinx stories, people who are out there navigating this messy, complicated country just like me.
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Their voices remind me that I'm not alone and that my voice still matters even when it shakes a little.
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If you can't tell.
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Every DACA recipient has their own story.
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And looking back, I realized that when I got involved in activism, I was just a kid and adults were expecting to carry a weight I barely understood.
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Now I'm a little older.
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I've lived a whole life.
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Mumble starting.
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There you go.
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I said my age.
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Oh, my God.
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I understand the risks, the fears, the responsibilities a lot more clearly now.
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And I also kind of understand what the fight is about more.
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Like when I was a kid, I just I didn't know, you know, and now I I'm like more aware, you know, and it's honestly just people every day that are just constantly educating me about something.
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I love that.
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My family still believes in keeping it low-key, and I respect that.
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Not everyone wants to be open about their status, especially right now.
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But for me, the silence only adds to the anxiety.
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I've learned the hard way that speaking out can have consequences, but staying quiet can eat you alive too.
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I've never been good at playing the traditional reporter role.
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I don't know if you can hear me speak, but I...
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stutter a lot my speaking is not that well um i asked too many questions that poke at the system itself that's why i created this podcast in the first place to make space for things that don't always fit into the mainstream and to be clear i'm not anti-newsroom i get it we all have bills to pay and honestly i grew up watching the news like honestly i would watch it to get the weather, like just to get the weather to see what cute outfit I needed for school, what the day was going to look like.
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It was going to rain.
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I was in California, so it barely rained, but you never know.
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And so I would just watch it and then, you know, the hosts were so funny, just listening to them talk, chat, like be friends.
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And I understand like the concept of like, you know, the newsroom of like, okay, this is, we only have so much time to talk about so much time, which is, you know, why I'm here.
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And I understand like just working in a, you know, bigger media, especially corporate can be a little hard.
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So, yeah.
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You know, this podcast doesn't pay my bills.
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So for now, I'm free to say whatever I want to say.
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I'm hoping that doesn't really change.
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But during my hiatus...
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I watched how podcasting played a huge role in politics.
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It helped shape narratives and even helped Trump win the election.
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I've got a lot of thoughts on that, but I'll save those for another time.
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Right now, I really want to share is that I moved.
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I left the valley.
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I know you can take a girl out of the valley though, but you can't take the valley out of the girl.
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That's for sure.
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And I'm going to tell you right now, sometimes people sometimes i'll walk around and be more making fun of me and i will i don't care i am a loud proud valley girl i like my accent i like my style i don't care i don't care if i come off very valley very la okay um it wasn't easy for me to leave okay but it was time The influencers came in, they kicked us all out, and now I got nowhere to go.
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I'm a struggling artist.
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I failed.
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I felt...
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No, I'm just kidding.
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I need a space to grow, actually.
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I need a space to grow, to explore, and to just reconnect with my creativity.
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I've landed somewhere in the Pacific Northwest.
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The area I moved, it's...
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pretty gloomy and you can get depressed very easily and i think for like you know the first couple months that i was there i was very convinced that i would move back home within three months so i made like no time to make friends and this is kind of a state or area that you kind of have to give yourself time to enjoy and like and make friends and then you will appreciate it a little more and i need a space to grow to explore and to reconnect with my creativity i've landed somewhere in the pacific northwest i mean i'm pretty loud i'm sure you know where i am um it's it's just rainy but i miss home i miss home and but you know what this area has been good to me so far i hope well yeah being away from la has just helped me slow down and reflect and while i have hope to go back one day this has just reminded me to that you don't need to be in la to tell a good story honestly you don't and also the area that i'm in like there's so much nature and in the areas that you know i grew up in like I love the beach and I love it but you know I love that I can walk down to a little lake here and it's like not that far and it's like there's little trees and I feel like in California you have to kind of drive for that you know so it just made me like just I'm a nature girly now like oh my god the valley girl loves nature now but hiking We're still working on that.
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I can still go on a hike, but, you know, on a good day.
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Not on a rainy day.
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Lately, I've started meeting people in the area who've inspired me all over again.
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So I have new stories, new perspectives, and hopefully some future guests for this podcast.
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And this time I actually mean it.
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I know last time I said it and then I dropped it and that seems to be like a thing with me.
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Okay, call me out.
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It's hot.
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okay uh but if you're still here if you're still listening after all this time if you're still following my journey on social media whether i'm being messy to make a point i don't know who i think i am jesus or someone or if you're following you know my little comic uh she'll be back i just want to say thank you there's been a couple of you guys that have reached out to me personally and have just really encouraged me to keep going you guys really see what i'm doing you see my work and honestly i don't need a thousand followers like i don't need like all the following in the world i like i've said it so many times i like i like my small audience you know because i feel like they've really seen me grow and they've really seen me change and they've really seen my voice change and they're still with me and I love that and I cherish that and they keep me going and at the end of the day like I don't know I just I do this for everyone like and I don't know at the end of the day like it just makes me like want to keep doing what I love you know and I know I am inconsistent with my work Things keep happening, I swear.
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The plot keeps changing.
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The plot keeps getting crazier.
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The plot keeps twisting.
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There's always a plot twist.
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Every time I think I have something, I'm like, oh, plot twist.
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But I see, trust me, I see the bigger picture.
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And it's one of the reasons that I was able to just honestly get my butt out of bed and just say, let's do this.
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Let's just record this today.
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Or I'm just going to keep pushing it off and I'm just going to do it in my truck because why is there people home all the time?
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Why is working from home a thing now?
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Okay.
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Sometimes I want a little privacy.
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I'm just kidding.
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My schedule is all over the place.
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So I guess I have time now.
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to focus on this and i don't actually have an excuse anymore so you can call me out next time you see me in person if you do not see another episode within the next two months oh my god you probably just heard someone turning on their car i'm really excited to see where this next chapter takes us but before i go I want to leave you with something I've been thinking about lately.
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For a long time, I felt this intense pressure to represent my entire community, to save us, to be the perfect voice, the perfect spokesperson, the one who gets it right every time, which I'm going to tell you right now, no.
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There's this idea that we have to be, like, the perfect dreamer, that the media wants the perfect dreamer, or it's just, you know, I don't know.
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There's bigger consequences, you know?
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And so there's a lot of weight for one person to carry.
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And then a couple years ago, I went to a screening of Lightyear, and there was a scene that hit me hard.
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Quick context.
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The gang got stuck in a room, and Buzz, being Buzz, tries to control and save the day, but in doing so, he isolates himself.
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That's when Izzy says to him, you don't need to save us, you need to join us.
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And I don't know, but I really needed to hear that, especially coming from Izzy.
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It made me realize how much I internalized this I need to save my people mindset, which, let's be real, is kind of a white savior complex that doesn't belong to me or my culture.
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My people don't need saving.
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They taught me community, how to show up for each other, how to struggle together, how to celebrate together.
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Sometimes I forget that.
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Sometimes I forget that's the very mindset that keeps us strong.
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I don't know what we need to be saved from, but I don't know.
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I found Jesus already, but That's on me.
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I can't save you like that.
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It's really funny.
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This country says that we have freedom of speech and freedom of religion, but we can't even talk about Jesus in a public setting or in a public space.
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I think that this country needs to learn how to communicate better and learn how to agree to disagree and walk away especially when things are just not going their way or things are getting heated and that applies to me it applies to everyone and i think in all sorts of relationships no matter what your religion or political side you're in at the end of the day we work better as a team and this podcast is just me joining the conversation not trying to lead it alone everyone is saying that i have to start filming myself while filming the podcast and i guess i will but i kind of miss the old radio vibes like i just remember listening to the radio as a kid and hearing the dj's voice but never like actually like knowing how they look like and for some reason that was just so refreshing to me and then when i did look at a photo of them every once in a while i was like huh interesting that's how you look like i was kind of hoping for that vibe but i guess i have to put myself out there so yeah welcome back to la chismosa del valle Hay que empezar a chismear.
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